I wish my head bleeds incessantly just to stop it from feeding my entire self the idea of making hard decisions. I am a little angered and dismayed since the very fact of making things work the way they are is far beyond than I could think - they're a mess. I feel stupid sometimes because the things that are supposed to be judged logically are alot of times done with sheer mediocrity. Damn! I'm even depressed with the very fact that I'm scared of past things that will become a vicious cycle and I'm even scared of the things that are yet to come for I may not be able to succeed them. I just hate for I felt so incapable a lot of times. Do you even imagine yourself in my shoes?
Well a lot of times we come across with these types of scenarios or events in our lives. As they say, we take part for every bit of fear, success, anger, bliss, chaos, jubilation and tribulations life brings us. But I like to argue if its really what it is in hard facts. I just thought that things will be different if we challenge ourselves to choose the right path; the right decisions that will bring us self fulfillment. But even so it takes an ounce of courage to say YES for the challenge and a thousand league of faith to go through the next steps.
You know what, I am presently confronted with a huge life changing decision. Yes I have decided it already but the thing is I don't know how to do and go with the rest of the process. I lack the confidence. I feel that bravado won't lead me to rewarding results. But the fact remains, if I'm going to be honest enough then it might spell out doom on my part. This is really tough; tougher than a sane mind could grasp. The fact is, the "yes" part of the challenge has been etched and still a long way to go to make things and let things fall in proper perspective.
I know I can make this work. I just hope our Lord will guide me well and bring forth aid in all the hardships this decision of mine brings. I just pray that I can succeed in this very long battle.
Happy Easter Sunday to all of those who have faith and to all who are yet to have it!!